Day 4

So I went to bed way too late. Went to sleep with some program I cannot recall, delta hopefully, my intent to be to sleep deeply more quickly than normal. Woke up this morning understandably sleepy, but feeling better than I would have otherwise.

Decided before work to try an upper-session so I used Procyon Preset #5, a 10 minute session called 'Quick Alertness', description: 7-28 Hz, concentration of Alpha/SMR (7 to 16 Hz), Bb 7-16 Hz. That was ok. The changes were fairly abrupt in light and sound and startled me several times, I didn't like that part much. The result reminded me of that funny quip about how drinking coffee does not sober you up, it just makes for a wide-awake drunk. I did not feel even slightly less tired in body after this but did feel alert.

Later when I had a brief break at work I decided to try Procyon Preset #13, an 18 minute session called 'Performance Intensive', description: 16-30 Hz, Bb2, Focus 16 Hz. That was fine, nearly fell asleep a couple times in that but felt fine when it was over. Once I got off work I thought about the 'rumor' that 'half an hour of a delta session equates to 3 hours of sleep' (I guess because the serious part of sleep is the delta), but I couldn't find a delta session of interest as there only seems a few, mostly the same just different lengths, and I'd done those. So I put on Procyon Preset #39, a 60 minute session called 'Middle Mind Centering', description: 9-24 Hz, Bb 1-2, Segs:22-14, 14-9, 9,10,11,12,13,13-9,9,9-14,14-24, Focus 9Hz. I liked that fine but ended up falling asleep in the middle.

I woke up late for something I was supposed to be to at 8:30pm darn it. After that, the kid and I watched "Troy". Basically that's a movie where you spend about 2 hours and 45 minutes learning to love and respect and admire the city of Troy and its royal family so that the last 20 minutes you can watch them all get slaughtered. I was pissed. Not my kind of movie. Yes, I prefer happy endings or at least not horrible endings. (The recent movie 'Knowing' was like that. I know people who really liked the ending. In the ending, the ENTIRE PLANET was annihilated. Who likes this kind of ending? Isn't that psychologically akin to liking slasher movies where your own species gets butchered? I mean come on! That's just sick!) So it made us a bit grouchy.

After the boyfriend call it's now nearly 4am and I have to get up in 3.5 hours yet again. I hate this schedule. I'm going to choose an hour delta and put that on lying on my pillow on my back and just fall asleep to it and hope it helps.

I do have to say that the alert ones don't make me feel as strongly "affected" as some of the others. In self-hypnosis I learned that it was really important to do it a LOT and to bring yourself deep down and then out again so you became able to radically shift states at will. It did more for keeping me out of natural hypnosis than putting me into it which really kinda saved me. I think for now, until I have time to focus on custom programs, I'm going to focus on doing some low theta or delta before sleep, some energy in the morning, some relaxation but upbeat in midday, and maybe a meditational in the late afternoon. In theory I'd like it if my brain kept that schedule anyway just for the sake of me getting things done and feeling good about it.

PJ

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